my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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