Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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