he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Randomize