he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize