You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
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I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
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Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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