oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize