worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
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