She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize