i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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