you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Randomize