Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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