i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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