Define "chronic" masturbator.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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