I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
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