yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
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i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
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Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
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