You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
my being single is dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Randomize