we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
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Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I would ride that face into the sunset
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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