It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize