I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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