I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize