Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize