8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
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