The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
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it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
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