Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize