It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize