gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this just has baby written all over it
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize