I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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