The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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