I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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