Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
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apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
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I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Drake has all the answers
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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