party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
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Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
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I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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