I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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