so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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