Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Mom said you looked used
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
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