Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
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