my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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