Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize