More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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