She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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