I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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