i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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