its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize