Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize