Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This show inspires me to have sex in space
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize