It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
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