There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
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i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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