I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize