Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
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