Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize