when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize